My husband and I found out we were expecting on June 30, 2007 and we couldn't be happier. I was only four weeks pregnant and I felt as though our lives would change forever. We had our first ultrasound done when I was five weeks and for the first time we saw our baby's heartbeat. Nothing could ever take that day away from us. As the weeks went by I became more anxious and we were so ready for our baby to become a part of our family.

From the very beginning of my pregnancy I went in for weekly ultrasounds since I was considered high risk. And boy was our little one growing. It was the most amazing experience we have ever seen. At nine weeks already our baby was the most beautiful baby we had ever seen. The ultrasounds continued and our baby kept on growing and becoming stronger by the day.

At 18 weeks we had our "big" ultrasound and we were so excited. My husband took the day off of work just to spend the day with our new baby to be and myself. At the doctors office we were on pins and needles waiting for our time and our time finally came. The ultrasound technician called our names and we were off to see our baby. My husband was of course hoping for a boy, but I didn't mind what we were having as long as our baby was healthy. After 45 minutes of battling with trying to get a "good look" we found out we were having a baby girl. She was very modest and was as stubborn as her daddy. We were happy none the less. We told everyone in our family, and no one could be more happy.

At 22 weeks I went in for another ultrasound to see how our little baby girl was doing. The ultrasound technician said she was doing great and looking stronger than ever. She also said that she was a little behind in growth ( A week and a day ) but not too worry that it sometimes happens. Not to worry huh? So I took her advice and it seemed as though our little girl was doing great. She was kicking and moving all the time.

Then devestation hit. On November 28, 2007 I decided to call the Dr. since I hadn't felt our little girl move in four days. The nurse came in with the fetal doppler and after 20 minutes without finding a heartbeat she sent me in for an emergency ultrasound with the doctor. In an instant our worlds were turned upside down. Our baby didn't make it. She had past away. But the only thing I remember when seeing her was how peaceful she looked. So innocent and so at peace.

On November 29, 2007, I went to our local hospital at 7:00am to be induced to deliver our little girl. The doctors and the nursing staff were so caring and my emotions were flooded with sadness. At 2:30pm I was put on a pitosen drip and labor was moving slowly for me. At 10pm the doctor came in and uped the pitosen dose and gave me an epidural. I went through no pain through the night other than my heart breaking.

November 30, 2007 at 1:04pm I gave birth to our daughter Emily Louise. She was a beautiful little girl. She had her daddys nose and my face. She had a head full of dark brown curly hair, just like her daddy's. We did not get to hold her, but I did hold her, for 7 months. Those 7 months were the best days of my life. I wouldn't trade them for the world. As a few months went by I now know that Emily was given to me for a reason. And that reason was to let her mommy know that she had a blood clotting disorder. Without her I would have never known that.

I would give anything to see her again but I do know that someday I will. She is with me everyday and we will keep her in our hearts forever.